Success in Stewardship

Yesterday, Preacher Mike preached about stewardship and it inspired me to blog about it and take my own approach to it... Enjoy! :)

In Luke 6:38 we read, “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap.” God gives you the ability to produce wealth, you must see your opportunity and acknowledge that everything comes from God.

Many think, “well,.. my situation is financially trying as well and .. .. ..” AND for those of you who catch yourself saying that, let me be the one to tell you. My family has been greatly blessed by the stewardship of this community, especially our amazing church family. Both have went above and beyond to help us through this past year of trials and triumphs. Many of them, didn’t think twice about going to the extreme to help us.

I am not saying the next time someone cries on your shoulder, run to the bank and drain your savings with no questions asked! I know that every dollar counts in a time when you have no money and are not exactly sure where your next dollar is going to come from. “Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God love a cheerful giver.” 2 Corinthians 9:7  

What I am trying to say is God will put you in a position to be a steward and give! When the opportunity arises give what you heart prompts you to give, give according to your ability and honor God with wealth.   

One thing that many don’t realize is you must care for yourself in order to be ABLE to care for others. Whether that be physically, mentally, or financially able—you need to have yourself together before you try and put yourself in the position to be a successful steward. There is no success if anyone suffers from your blessings, including yourself (you know, the person we all seem to leave out).

Paul was like a father to his protégé, Timothy. He was most concerned with Timothy looking after himself. “Stop drinking only water and use a little wine because of your stomach and your frequent illnesses.” (1 Timothy 5:23) With safe drinking water difficult to find, Paul urged the young pastor to drink some wine to keep himself in decent shape. He didn’t think that caring for our physical bodies was a waste of time or a vanity. On the contrary, maintaining our physical health is an important part of maintaining our spiritual health. Paul wanted to see Timothy flourish, and in flourishing, to serve others more effectively.

How would you rate your job at taking care of yourself?

 Does your level of rest or fitness hold you back from anything God wants you to do?

What is the relationship between physical and spiritual health?

What are your natural talents? “Each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, and another has that.” (1 Corinthians 7:7) God gives skills and ability. (“God given talent”) Different people are blessed with different gifts, do not neglect your gift. Utilize your skills and ability to its’ full potential, reach for the skies!!  What blessings has God given you? Say you got a promotion at work, bought a new house or earned your PhD. God had blessed you! Now what are you going to do with that blessing? God made David king so that he could bless God’s people. God expects us to use what we’ve been given to help others too. Why did God bless you? Perhaps you got a raise so you could give more generously to a ministry. Perhaps he gave you a home so you could welcome others into it. Only when you look beyond yourself will you be able to see God’s greater purpose. “And David knew that the Lord had established him as king over Israel and had exalted his kingdom for the sake of his people Israel.” (2 Samuel 5:12)

Based on how you spend your time, what would an outside observer conclude your highest priorities are in life? Ask yourself, what are some realistic, practical ways to make God your highest priority? As you get older, life gets more complicated. Demands on your time and attention continue to mount, and there’s never enough time or energy in the day to get everything accomplished, right? Do you find yourself longing for a simpler life? When all is said and done, the focus of your life should be to love God and love others. Do the things that fill your heart, life and schedule reflect those priorities? By discovering and focusing your energy on what God considers most important, you begin to find clarity and purpose for each day of your life. What changes do you need to make in how you spend your time? When considering my priorities I like to focus on the unseen and consider loss for the sake of Christ. Always remember, faith expressed through love is what counts.

“But godliness with contentment is great gain.” 1 Timothy 6:6

 Ugh, Money- we spend so much time pursuing it, managing it and thinking about it. How much should you save, invest, and spend? If you're married, how much should go toward shopping verses your husband's golf game or hunting expenses? Who should pay the bills? Stress over money can make a person feel torn or drive a couple apart. We all know the financial strain of life is responsible for many failed marriages.

But in the end, money has no real, eternal value. It's ultimately worthless! it cannot save you or satisfy you, and it can distract you from what's really important! So the next time a conflict over money erupts in your heart- ask yourself; is it really worth the worry?

Closing this post a little differently... Here are some words to ponder... Things that have really stuck with me through my readings lately.

Encourage improvement in  one's accountability. Romans 14:12 says, "So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God." We need to recognize God will judge the past, we are accountable for our words, and never forget that God sees everything!

For those who struggle with authority, Romans 13:1- "Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except  that which God has established." Keep in mind, God gave authority to humans and God gives authority to rulers.

I believe the secret in contentment is simply trusting in God! "Keep your eyes free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." -- Hebrews 13:5  ........ One needs to set proper priorities to succeed! ! !

Make the commitment! Do not grow weary of doing good! Serve wholeheartedly! Set a goal and dont quit until you reach it!!! Seek the counsel of many advisers, dont be afraid to ask! Give back whatever you owe and then some.

Remember, the love of money causes discontent and trouble. Prioritize, place God before everything and all your blessings will follow!

Have a blessed day! :)

Faith in a Family's Changes..

                 This week we are going to discuss our family. Focusing mostly on acceptance, transformations, security and release within your immediate family.

 

While hunting for scripture I wanted to focus on this week, Sarah and Abraham caught my attention. Genesis 23:1-2; Genesis 25:1 tells us that “Sarah lived to be a hundred and twenty seven years old. She died at Kiriath Arba….. Abraham took another wife, whose name was Keturah.” Today, remarriage is such a common reality. But a second marriage brings added complications, especially when children are involved. Abraham remarried after Sarah died, and he and Keturah had six children together. In Abraham’s time, family relationships and inheritances were more strictly defined by culture, which eliminated some of the uncertainly and insecurity. But it didn’t alter the fact that it was difficult adjusting to major changes. And the same is true today. Kids in particular can be confused by remarriage and may want back to their old lives. We are called to accept each person in a blended family---- but it takes hard work, love and forgiveness.

My personal feelings on this are very widely spread, I do not believe in people staying together because it is for the children. I am also not a naive woman, I know that people change.. husbands and wives fall out of love.. it’s reality, we as woman must accept it. I don’t know how I would feel if Kory and I separated and he remarried.. It almost brings me to tears just typing it. I honestly believe God brought us together for many reasons and that we are meant to spend eternity as one. I know that I love Kory so much I would always want him to be happy. Being the selfless person that I am, I would never remarry. It’s a decision I made when I married Kory. I feel he is only person I was meant to marry and my feelings on that are very supported and I know that will never change. (Another {completely unrelated} example of these type of decisions that I have made, I would never want to be cremated…just as an example, it is what it is – won’t ever change.)  Back on topic, if we ever separated-- I would want Kory to go on and live a happy life.. if that means moving on and remarrying, so be it. I know it would be the hardest thing I ever would have to do, seeing him love another woman like he is supposed to love me, but again, I would always want him to be happy. I want our girls to know the true meaning of “happily ever after”. Marriage is hard work and it takes the love of two people to make it work. Sometimes people say, you shouldn’t have to “work” for your love/marriage –it should “just happen”.. I always chuckle.. those people 9 times out of 10—aren’t married and never have been!

“Joseph said to his brothers, ‘Come close to me.’ When they had done so, he said, ‘I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold in Egypt!” Genesis 45:4

It’s a fact, no family is perfect. But what exactly makes a home dysfunctional? A dysfunction is simply something that ceases to function correctly, right? When families stop protecting, loving and sharing with each other, they’ve lost their original function. Family members turn against each other, and a mountain of bitterness forms. The good news is that this process is reversible. Joseph’s family was a model of dysfunction, but after many years God transformed each member’s heart.

                           “Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him.” Psalm 62:5

Growing up, most of us found security in our parents. It didn’t matter what happened as long as they hugged us and told us everything would be fine. As we got older, we realized our parents would fix every problem, but we still felt more secure knowing they were there. It hurts to think about living without them, let alone actually doing it. It’s one hard reality of these decades of life. Whenever you experience that loss, let it remind you to find security in God. He’s the only refuse you can count on in an ever-changing world!!!!!!

                    “Hatred stirs up dissension, but loves covers over all wrongs.” Proverbs 10:13

Sometimes, letting go is easier said than done! No matter how great your in-laws are, you’ll likely have conflict at some point. You may disagree where you spend holidays, how you discipline your child or even what church to attend. You may sometimes feel like the daughter in-law your in-laws wish they never had or maybe the opposite (as is in my case), I am confident that my in-laws are very blessed to have me as their daughter-in-law. However, some woman I know hate being in the same room with their “monster-in-law”. How you respond in certain situations will either bring you closer as a family or drive your further apart. When conflicts arise, ask yourself “Is it really worth the battle?” Learn to let go. For some, letting go is the hardest thing to ask them to do. In letting go, it doesn’t stop there.. refuse to dwell on it. Choose to not even see it anymore because you know that God’s love covers over your own wrongs.

Raising God's Children....

As I start my preparations for summer break, with a hyperactive soon-to-be five year old I need to find plenty of things for her to do. With that being said I need to take a lot of things into consideration. As June approaches, we will be celebrating our oldest daughters fifth birthday. I don’t know about you ladies but I feel this is the age where your hair starts to gray? (Correct me if I’m wrong older but wiser gals…) It seems like she is picking up on all the wrong things. I can do a million and one things good in a day and if I do one wrong thing she catches it and repeats it fifty million more times in the following days! I realized just the other day, I myself am a very “repetitive” person… my husband says I have “my way” of doing everything, whether it be the way I load the dishwasher, how I fold my laundry, how I place the bills in order, how things goes in the refrigerator, etc. etc. Too make a long story short, this has definitely something I have been praying for… guidance from God on how I need to approach this summer. All of the sudden, there it was the answer to my question is lying right in front of me. Repetition! Does this mean I want my daughter to suffer the wrath of this “repetitive” personality trait, absolutely not. At times, this has consumed me and brought me more anxiety than needed. My life is so overwhelming that if I don’t have a schedule everything falls apart. Occasionally, I will get in these moods where I won’t nothing more than to break away from the schedule, but when I do I return to find this overwhelming to-do list that I cannot ever come back from! Lonnnnnnnng story short…. I think I can use repetition to my advantage in so many ways. Think of the simplest of the simple things in life, …… (don’t over think here) …. I am talking about the things we do that we don’t even think about… flipping on a light switch as you walk past- half the time I don’t even plan to do it, it’s just there and that is what I do every time I see a light switch, right? … putting car key in the ignition, that is what I have to do every time I get in a car, right?.... putting on shoes before you leave the house, something I do every time I leave the house, right?..... Are you getting my point?   Repetition makes things simple and seem as though we didn’t even have to try to do that … our brain just did it. (Hmmm.. if only my brain would train me to work out like it trained me to turn on those light switches….)

“These commandments that I give to you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children.” Deuteronomy 6:6-7

“If it were that important I would have remembered it!” --- How many times have you said that or been told that?... I am guilty of both- HOWEVER, after some careful reading, I now know this is a big fat lie! Think about it, our abundant use of sticky notes, calendars, and electronic organizers (“Better save that as a reminder in my phone so it goes off and I don’t forget”,… right???) ---- this all attests to the fact that we function best with constant reminders. I needed to find something to support my theory through scripture,… When God first gave instructions to the Israelites, he knew his people would need daily reminders. The most important information is not absorbed instantly---- humans need repetition! We as parents need to find ways to remind children daily of God’s wisdom and love for them. Children need to be reminded as much as we do. One of the things I want to do with Maddie this summer is have weekly “Bible Messages”. Each week we will focus on: trust, courage, faith, wisdom, love, fear, hatred, etc. etc. Not only will that give Maddie the opportunity to express herself as well as better understand the changes she is going through with becoming a “big girl” J .

How many of you talk about God with your children? Is it something that comes easy to you? Do you and your spouse both have the same views, if not does it cause conflict with how you raise your children?

Well, as you all know, I am not afraid of the touchy subjects. This one may be a touchy subject for some. With all the ugly child abuse stories you hear about these days people are almost too afraid to discipline their children. To me I can some this up rather quickly,.. 10-15 years ago when you misbehaved after a verbal warning you were spanked with a belt, correct? … A sting that lasted awhile… a sting that you didn’t want again for a while.. correct?  Now, a woman’s 13 year old gets pregnant and she posts all over her social media pages that she is going to be a Grandma… hmmm… Kids get arrested or ticketed and somehow its law enforcements fault? Bottom line,…. It’s your horrible parenting skills! ! ! We have all met people who grew up without discipline—and that neglect is another form of abuse! Well, neglecting to discipline your child when necessary is abuse as well. When Eli refused to discipline his children God stepped in. God approves of us to discipline our children—in fact, God expects us to lovingly discipline our children. Proper discipline provides a sense of structure for children, allowing them to feel safe. And giving children consequences for their actions while they’re young spares them from greater consequences as adults.

As parents, you need to know the difference between abuse and discipline. If you are irresponsible there is a fine line. If you are unable to control certain situations create a chart to keep on your refrigerator of Level 1 Level 2 Level 3 with consequences for the certain levels. Children need structure to succeed. You as there parent must provide that structure or you are FAILING your child! ………………. It is completely acceptable to SPANK your child’s bottom --- It is not acceptable to punch your child in the face and black their eyes or break their nose, etc. ---- is it really that hard to understand?! … I am ashamed of parents who do not have discipline and I unfortunately see so many children who are very disrespectful to their parents… but how do you approach the parents and tell them they are failing their children?!?!? ….. because believe me I have a contact list READY!  Slight humor: Should I just call them up and say, “Hey, it’s Mickayla- just on my way over to spank you children, since they are the most worst behaved children I have ever seen in ummm… FOREVER! Be there in a few minutes” (Click!)

What is the goal of discipline? Do you know someone who grew up without discipline? What makes disciplining children so difficult? What are ways you discipline your children? Does the way you were raised effect the way you are raising your children?

“Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.” 1 Corinthians 11:1

I am no way saying I am “A Model Mom” However------ I plan to one day be looked at as a “Model Mom” when I am old enough to have that title… I am definitely still a Rookie at this point! As a mother, you have a unique position, both as a parent and as a child of God. Moms know what is best for their children. Our rules are for our children’s own good. We know that our children will be happier if they learn to obey. In the same way, God, our heavenly Father, has rules meant for our good, right? Do we obey him the way we want our children to obey us? Do we trust God the way we want our children to trust us? Because if we don’t guess who’s watching! Choose to openly obey God in front of your children! Be the model you want them to follow!

As if that wasn’t enough to get you brain going … ask yourself this:  

What strengths do you want your children to inherit from you? What weaknesses do you have that you hope they avoid? What recent choices might you have made differently if you were conscious that your children had been watching?.....

“Do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4

As parents, we know we should love our children equally, yet we do ourselves a disservice if we set out to love our children in the same exact way. (NOTE THE DIFFERENCE.) Children are individuals with different wants, needs and interests. The parenting methods that worked with child number one may completely fail with child number two. (Take my situation for example… )

It is completely up to the parents to discover how each child wants to be loved. Resist the urge to love your children in the way you prefer. Adjust your style to cater to each child. Make sure each one knows he or she is loved. It is very hard to take time for each child to have “Mommy or Daddy Time” but it is so very important. I know this personally… All the time we spent with Emma in the hospital over the last year…. Maddie at one time begged us to leave Emma at the hospital and just come home and be normal for the night. We knew at that very moment. No matter what the sacrifice had to be, Maddie needed us too. It was so hard to except that we couldn’t be by Emma’s side 24/7… and we slowly started with taking turns and slowly transitioned. The difference it made in Maddie in a matter of a few days she had her spark back. I can’t imagine what was going on in her little mind. There were days in the beginning that she really had no idea what was going on, we told her. But the comprehension just wasn’t quite there yet. Now, she talks to the doctors about Emma’s sats and her heart rate and how its funny when people get scared because her ‘box is beeping’ and they just don’t know Emma she says. ….
Even right now all the things that are going on with the flooding… The adults are anxious and nervous of the unknown. The children are listening to every phone conversation, reading things online, and chatting with their friends at school that “My Mom said this will happen…. My Dad said this is going to happen…. My Uncle works for the city and he said…. “ and the list goes on and on. You are not the only one who is going through this journey. As parents, if you are nervous or anxious about things your actions affect your children and they will react to your emotions. Take this into considerations as the anxiety sets in with whatever situation it may be, sickness in the family… emergency situations…. Disaster.. etc.

Closing with Some Scripture:

·          “The Lord sustains the humble but casts the wicked down.” Psalm 147:6

·          “Sons are a heritage form the Lord, children are a reward from him.” Psalm 127: 3-5

·         “Her children arise and call her blessed.” Proverbs 31:28

·         “By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.”  Proverbs 24:3

·         “And Jesus grew in his wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men.” Luke 2:52

·         “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6

·         “The same Lord is Lord of all.” Romans 10:12

·         “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.”  Romans 12:10

·         “Honor your father and your mother.” Exodus 20:12

·         “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give to you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children.”    Deuteronomy 6: 5-6

·         “Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the days of trouble come.”  Ecclesiastes 12:1

A Healthy Faith.....

From one extreme to the next, .. This week I want to take a look into our physical well-being… covering numerous topics to suit all types of women. From getting older and dealing with gravity, discussing addiction of all types, finding a healthy balance in your life, and most importantly seeing your health as an investment in your family’s future… where would they be without you? Are you neglecting an important physical aspect of your health that may affect your entire family if you do not tend to it?

Let’s face it, getting older comes with many obstacles. I know (especially with the stresses of my daily life) I will not be looking as youthful as Jenny McCarthy at 40, Reba McEntire at 57, or Cher at 66. Let’s not forget Betty White who is still rockin’ the red carpets at 91 years old! But, in my defense I also cannot afford Botox! In reality, for most of us getting older will mean losing our youthful beauty and experiencing the breakdown of our bodies.  Trading in the push-ups for the 18 hour bras.. (you know me always sneaking in a little humor.) However, God tells us that there is loveliness that comes from maturity. Society has made every woman insecure in some way! “My hips are wide”, “My nose is funny”, “my butt is too big”, “my butt is too little”, “my hair is straight”, “my hair is frizzy”, “I have thunder thighs”, … the list goes on and on! The way society portrays women these days is incompatible with reality. If you care that much about what society thinks of your physical appearance, ask yourself… What would society think of your spiritual appearance?

When we know Jesus as our Savior, we are more aware that each day brings us closer to that place where there will be no more tears, no more sorrow, no more death. Growing older for the child of God does not mean feeling useless and ugly. I believe it means growing up and maturing into a person whose true beauty becomes even more apparent. Growing older for a child of God is supposed to mean growing to look like God-----showing unconditional love, compassion and mercy.  Ask yourself, what is your true beauty?

Proverbs 3:7-8 says, “Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.”

Unfortunately, addiction seems to hit several families these days. In Psalm 109, David describes the negative physical effects of his mental stress- - his thin and fragile body giving away, his physical strength worn thin. Sadly, we see people today suffering from the similar physical effects—but not only for a lack of food, but for mental reasons as well. Some women who are tormented by mental stress try to find comfort through what they eat—or don’t eat! Others take a good physical activity – (like exercise) and distort it. A disorder of any kind, left unchecked, can consume you. Get help! Talk to a trusted mentor, a Christian friend, or counselor. Never forget to pray for those struggling with addiction but always remember you cannot help someone who does not want to be helped. No matter how much you try, they have to want to change for themselves. Being addicted is simply a compulsive need for something . . . this could be alcohol, nicotine, heroin, etc. but could also be a compulsive need for anything causing negativity in your life. (How long can you do without checking your Facebook? Do you often find yourself ignoring family because you are scrolling the newsfeed? People joke of “being addicted to Facebook”… are some maybe serious?” --- )

Personally, I haven’t had much dealing with addiction but any input would be valued.. (if anyone would like to utilize the “sending a private message and posting as an “Anonymous Post” with a private story with addiction or struggles of a family fighting addiction I would completely understand.)

Psalm 109:26 says, “Help me, O Lord my God; save me in accordance with your love.”

Do you have good balance in your life? Some women have the gift of serving others and they serve until they can’t stand up anymore. You might be one of those amazing women! You say to yourself, “I don’t have the time to rest” or “I don’t have the time to be sick”… but let’s face it ladies—although we seem to have super powers at times, we are still humans—our bodies do wear down, we get sick or just plain tired. That’s when we can ask the “big man upstairs” for help for he is the source of strength and healing. No matter how old we get.. Jesus will still be in the miracles business! And ladies let’s all keep in mind that there’s nothing wrong with finding the healthy balance by meeting your own needs so you can continue to meet the needs of others. (For example, as much as it felt like a kick in the face—for the sake of my entire family… I had to ask for more nursing help..  At first I felt like the more help I needed the less of a mother that made me.. Definitely not the case and I realize that but sometimes we, as women, always see the negative- and are too hard on ourselves.

One thing that’s certain about life is that.. It is uncertain! We know tomorrow is not promised. That is why is it crucial that we spend our time investing what really matters today (Ephesians 5: 15-16 says: “be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil”). We must constantly remind ourselves of what is eternal and what is just temporary. Time clocks must be punched, dishes must be done, and laundry must be cleaned. However, the important thing that we all seem to forget is the people in our lives are far more important than running a business or having a perfect house. This week let us remind ourselves what is important, invest in your family. Eliminate a commitment or two that takes you unnecessarily away from your family. You need to set aside and protect ‘family time’.  In the madness of our lives, we have to plan QUALITY family time… IT WON’T JUST HAPPEN! ---- Take away the electronics and play a board game as a family this week!  Do you have a relative in a nursing home?—Take your family out to play a board game or talk about your childhood with your elderly family member… Let your children listen to what you did as a kid without an Ipad, Iphone, Internet, Xbox, etc.  

Discussion questions and more scripture to be shared on the discussion board in the next few days.

Feel free to email me at mickaylamcgovern@gmail.com  with any private discussions. I will respond as promptly as possible.

Emerging Emotions...

Different people define emotions in different ways. Some make a distinction between emotions and feelings saying that a feeling is the response part of the emotion and that an emotion includes the situation or experience, the interpretation, the perception, and the response or feeling related to the experience of a particular situation.

We as christian women, mothers, leaders in the community, mentors, and/or whatever else you may be to others around you... we need to control our emotions. Your emotions can make or break any situation.Controlling your emotions doesn't mean ignoring them. It means you recognize them and act on them when appropriate, not randomly and uncontrollably whenever you feel like it. Take control of your life by taking control of your emotions.

(*These are ways I have found flaws in myself.. These are the things I need to work on with my emotions... hopefully at least one person can relate to these key points in controlling their emotions... NOTE TO SELF: Pointing out the negative characteristics about yourself is not an easy task.)

Knowing your emotions.. There are a million different ways you can feel, however, human emotions have been classified into a few basics that everyone can recognize: joy, acceptance, FEAR, surprise, disgust, sadness, ANGER, and anticipation.

I need to work on accepting and recognizing that emotions don't just appear mysteriously out of nowhere. Many times, we're at the mercy of our emotions on a subconscious level. By recognizing your emotions on a conscious level, you're better able to control them.

Stop and analyze what you were thinking about, until you find out what is causing that emotion. Don't be so quick to act-- that is when we hurt the ones we love.

Ask yourself, "What is another way to look at the situation that is more rational and more balanced than the way I was looking at it before?"  (This helps me so much!!) Explore the different possibilities! If nothing else, thinking about other possible interpretations will alert you to many different scenarios, and the difficulty of jumping to conclusions.

Something we never think to do is consider your options. Now that you know what emotion you're dealing with, think of at least two different ways to respond. Your emotions control you when you assume there's only ONE way to react, but you have to recognize you ALWAYS have a choice!

Personally, I not only need to recognize that I have a choice... but I then need to make a choice. When deciding what to do, it's important to make sure it's a conscious choice, not a reaction to another, competing emotion.
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Browsing through my Bible, I stumbled across scripture that to me says I need to see myself as a Princess !! ------

Okay, so it doesn't exactly say that but Isaiah 28:5 does say "In that day the Lord Almighty will be a glorious crown, a beautiful wreath for the remnant of his people."

That to me tells me beyond all the discouragement in life... God is going to give me that crown. He is the only one who's opinion matters. Why am I trying to please all the people who drag me down? When if I please God he's going to give me that beautiful crown.... I would much rather be a Princess of God then a "princess" in today's society!

We can all empathize with the feeling of being trapped in depressing or destructive situations. Perhaps you work with people who see nothing wrong with dishonesty, and you're waging what feels like a losing battle for the truth. Maybe your husband is very discouraging. To those hoping in the darkness, God promises to adorn us with his glory, to encircle our bowed and tired heads with this magnificent crown: which represents his presence. God has a special place in his heart for the mistreated. In reality, we've all been beaten down by the world at one time or another. When you feel discouraged, anxious, or uncomfortable-- picture God's presence, like a beautiful crown, resting on you,... strengthening you! (That is how I interpreted that .... maybe I just want to be a princess.. )


"In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace." -- Ephesians 1:7-8

Women today are often burdened by guilt. We are overwhelmed with the "should of's". Some women feel guilty if they work and guilty if they don't work. We feel guilty if we aren't spending enough time with our husbands, children, friends, or other family. A lot of times I feel guilty for not taking time for myself and for God. Whether this guilt we feel is fiction or reality..  whether we are just feeling the pressure of social expectations or we have really wronged God, or others, either intentionally or unintentionally, we have hope! Jesus declared from the cross that those who follow him are forgiven, right?... Even for unintentional sins! On the cross Jesus Christ took our place and bore all our despair and guilt as if it were his own. Our Savior has dealt with our guilt once for all. What is there left for us to bear?...Nothing.  LET GO OF THE GUILT! Right here, Right Now! The 'guilt' is gone! Accept that you are who you are... you are an amazing beautiful woman whom God created for a purpose! That purpose was not to degrade yourself to no end. Quit dwelling on the negativity in your life and find your purpose. God put every one of us on this Earth for a reason. You reason may not be to be a multi-million dollar super model... however, God has a plan and a purpose for us all and that is far greater than being looked at as a super star in society's eyes. Who are you? Find who you are? Can't see past the guilt in your life..... Drop it! It is gone from this minute on do NOT allow it to carry on!

My way of letting go of guilt was/is finding joy in all the things I used to find guilt in. Once again, going back to finding the positive in every negative situation. Galatians 5:22-23 says "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law." With that being said... Joy--true joy-- originates from God and from living in close connection with God, not from  our immediate situations or emotional states. If you only go to God in times of need, shame on you! God wants us to know joy NOW! Not tomorrow, or the next day, or even next month. You don't wait for when you are healed, not when sorrow has passed, not when we've became successful, not when children or spouse's change, not when we've lost ten pounds, not when you have paid off your debt, received a promotion or brought a bigger home, but NOW----this very day! You are thinking, not today... I didn't do anything today... today wasn't a successful day.. why today? .... I'm not proud of today!... Lasting joy does not reside in God's blessings, God's favors, God's gifts or God's people--- but in God himself! Take time this day to seek the Lord and draw upon him to find your joy---- in return you will find strength in yourself!

Last but not least... Something I struggle with every second of the day. I thank society for this strain. In reality, I can change it. I have control of this so why not remove the anxiety and replace it with new-found confidence. I stumbled across several references to scripture before I decided, Psalm 71:5-6 hit the spot,... "For you have been my hope, O Sovereign Lord, my confidence since my youth. From birth I have relied on you; you brought me forth from my mother's womb. I will ever praise you." Amen? ... When we feel weak in the knees and lack confidence, we are most open to relying on God. The Bible gives us declaration after declaration of God's strength in the face of our limited abilities: "I can do everything through him who gives me strength"(Philippians 4:13). "Nothing is impossible with God" (Luke 1:37). "Nothing is too hard for [the Lord]" (Jeremiah 32:17). "In all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us" (Romans 8:37). "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" (2 Corinthians 12:9). (FORGIVE ME FOR THE OVERWHELMING REFERENCE TO SCRIPTURE...) My point here is simple, nothing silences the voice of timidity as powerfully as the voice of Scripture.

So if you find yourself in a new situation this week, make sure you place your lack of confidence in the limitless God.

Ladies, every man will tell you... there is nothing more sexy than a confident woman! Find the confidence you need. Hold your head high... you deserve to be recognized for the things you hide. I am eager to see you grow... as women it is hard for us to be confident... Men, however, seem to have it down... confidence is sometimes widely mistaken for a appealing trait when sometime it can be annoying... if taken to far.
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In addition to the post this week, I also took the time to look up some scripture for certain emotions.. Typing it all out would have lost your interest... So here they are, if you have the time and want to look them up I strongly encourage it... I found myself scratching my head saying "Hmmmmm..." a lot.

Anger: James 1:19-20, Psalm 4:4, Proverbs 14:16-17, Ephesians 4:26-27

Anxiety: Philippians 4:6, Psalm 94:18-19, Isaiah 45:5-7, Matthew 6:28-34

Fear: John 14:27, Psalm 27:1,14, Matthew 10:29-31, John 14:27

Guilt: Ephesians 1:7-8, Isaiah 1:18, Hebrews 10:22-23

Joy and Happiness: Philippians 4:4, Psalm 100:1-2, Habakkuk 3:17-18

Worry: Psalm 55:22, Nahum 1:7, Matthew 6:25-34, John 14:1, 27
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Make Your Marriage God's Masterpiece..

“Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain.” –Psalm 127:1

Picture this, for years you have been planning your dream home! When you are about to begin the construction process, the most famous builder in the world approaches you and offers to build the house for you. Wouldn’t it be utterly foolish to reject his offer and instead try building it on your own? In that same way--- God is the master builder of the family! Let him show you how to build a marriage and family that will exceed your most cherished expectations and dreams. Follow his direction and his guidelines…. Trust in him to show you how to build something that will last!

As I have mentioned before… we need a strong foundation. You need a stable personal foundation to have a stable foundation with another individual to make a marriage work. Correct? Sure, it may work “as is” for a while... but what happens when one of those storms come through like we discussed. . . You are going to crumble because you have not spiritually prepared for the storm.

In marriage we face many obstacles. I have selected 12 key points I want to touch on that I feel are all of importance.

In Genesis 2:24 we read, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and become united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” This of course is God’s Ideal… these days- does it hardly ever happen that way, not so much... but how inspiring and holy would scripture be if it read, “Thou shall be pregnant at age 15, experience extreme confusion on which one night stand was the other responsible party, and thou parents shall provide for unborn child until child/”said parent” is of legal age.” Right? 

For one to share the bond of husband and wife a connection must be made. Somehow, for whatever reason the couple is in love. Correct? Ephesians 5:1-2 tells us to “be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” So in Peter 4:8 we read that “Love covers over a multitude of sins”, right? In John 13:34-35 tell us to love one another- “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

As a husband, “Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself and the wife her husband.” –Ephesians 5:33. Since we are focusing on the ladies I will just simply leave some references to scripture for you to pass on if you would like…. Genesis 2:24, Proverbs 5:18, & Ephesians 5:25.

Here we go ladies, Proverbs 31:10-12 will make you smile; “A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” -----Ahhhhh… Where would these men be without us?

Simplifying the overall outlook of marriage, one of two things can happen- one would be a positive outcome and one would be more of a negative outcome (in my opinion).

POSITIVE:            Obviously if you are content in your marriage, work as a team when it comes to decision making, develop good communication, and have a strong bond,… you will have success. In Hebrews 13:5 we read, “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have.” Too many times we confuse what we want with what we need and this causes conflict between spouses. Whether it be an argument over finances igniting or a lack of communication—you will in return have to face that one did wrong and they may not see it as ‘wrong’ but maybe as a ‘reward’. Marriage is a partnership you need to be able to agree when necessary as well as agree to disagree at time. Decision making needs to be a strong point in your marriage. We need to listen to advice, seek the counsel of many advisors, and obtain guidance. As we read in Psalm 25:4-5, “Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me. Be open to discussion, you don’t always have to have the last word. As women, this is something we struggle with. We sometime tend to think we have to have the final say and it sometimes leads to more problems. (Just food for thought..)

Picture this, your laying a new sidewalk in front of your home. This sidewalk will not take a lot of concrete therefore you choose to purchase the ready-mix bags of concrete. All you will have to do is add water and stir until ready to pour. Easy enough, right? Well a marriage without good communication is like trying to complete your sidewalk without any water…. POOF! Many times as husband and wife, our words get the best of us. Haven’t we all had those moments where we have said something and once we cool down we realize we didn’t mean that at all? …. Guess what? Sometimes, one you say those things they are there and they leave a scar. “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” (Proverbs 16:24) So, we need to be a little more careful of how quick we are to speak in anger. Guard your words, choose them carefully for they can make or break a very special bridge in your marriage. We need to learn to speak more graciously, yet still speak the truth in love.

As I mentioned before, without the proper foundation—it is a lot harder to succeed in any situation. If you have not established that strong foundation in your marriage, success is a long shot and you probably don’t have the club to make the shot! As we all hate to face it, the divorce rate is climbing. I don’t at all think people should live with one another when they are not truly happy. Does this mean throw marriage around like nothing and get divorced? Absolutely not! There are so many couples who get divorced without even trying… If that is the case you didn’t deserve to get married in the first place. It sickens me how it’s “just a piece of paper” to some people. I am sorry, but my marriage is far more than a “piece of paper”… we aren’t talking about our English homework here! Maddie always says, “Mommy, the bible says God made a very special woman for every man out there and there is only one!” Still haven’t found those exact words … but I did see that 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 says, “A woman must not separate from her husband. If she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband.” Do I think it is wrong that people get divorced? Absolutely not! Do I think many people rush into marriage before they know whether or not they truly love each other? 100 % yes! I know several people who have divorced and remarried and live completely happy lives... my own opinion of this is that for whatever reason they didn’t marry the right person the first time. For whatever reason that foundation wasn’t established, there was not contentment, no communication, and probably a “my way or the highway” method of decision making. And to this I say that some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. By failing with the first marriage, many people be sure to do things right the second time. We can’t all be perfect, as I said in the beginning we are going to make a positive out of ‘mistakes’ we have made and we will grow from them, as will others.

There are many reasons for divorce. In Proverbs 6:32 it says that a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself.  SO true! Who wants to be with a cheater? They are damaged goods, right? (More scripture relating to adultery: Exodus 20:14, 2 Samuel 11, & Matthew 5:27-28) Jealousy is something some struggle with; I know I have struggled with this in my own marriage. We are women- for whatever reason there will always be someone out there skinnier, funnier, and prettier. We have to face it and move on! However, so many people let jealousy get the best of them when in fact, there was nothing to be jealous of in the first place… If you establish a good foundation in your marriage- even Baywatch Barbie won’t be able to bring you down. You will be dancing around in your kitchen, cooking supper singing, “My baby loves me just the way that I am!!!” at the top of your lungs…. Ohhhhhhkkkaaaaaaaaaaaaay… maybe not- but how many of you just pictured yourself or even me dancing around the kitchen like that. (It was a good laugh anyways… we all need those every once in a while!) Proverbs 27:4 is powerful it reads “Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming but who can stand before jealousy?”---------

As awkward as this is... I have to break out the pillow talk---- Trying to find appropriate references to start me off has me stumped. God has designed your sexuality to be like a plant that only grows in the right greenhouse. That greenhouse is marriage! God wants you to enjoy being caressed by your husband, to long for his arms wrapped around you and to find comfort, joy and strength in your sexual relationship! If you are just enduring sex instead of enjoying it--- then you need to talk to your husband! This is where some carry the past like a heavy burden. . . Ask yourself: Is there an underlying problem in your marriage that is interfering? Are unresolved problems from your past choking out your pleasure? (Is it fair that your husband is paying for things he has no control over?) Are there things that your husband or you could do differently in the bedroom? ---- Try talking openly about your sex life, it helps a lot! Think back to when you first got together, find that spark again and reignite it.

Your marriage should be a commitment for life! Whatever happened to “’til death do us part,” – it used to be that when couples pledged themselves in marriage they meant it. Sadly, many Christian couples today enter into marriage thinking they can always get out and try again if this marriage doesn’t work. Yet God designed marriage as a permanent union of two people into one for his glory---not a temporary alliance until something goes wrong or one of the people find a better option! ------ (This topic frustrates me and I could go on for hours about how disappointed I am in today’s society!!!!!!!) Is it really too much to ask for, really? Why do people not take marriage seriously? God does!

Closing this post—I could have taken several different approaches but I want to take a look at our daily choices in your marriage. Perhaps your marriage isn’t delivering the fairy-tale life you’d dreamed of. Your prince devotes all his time and energy to work, sports, the computer, the car, the yard, the cell phone, HUNTING----anything but you. He’s more like a roommate than the soul mate you had hoped for. And you’re starting to wonder if it’s worth staying or if you should just give up. NEWS FLASH: Real life isn’t a fairy tale and real life is not that fuzzy feeling in your tummy they describe in movies—it’s a choice God calls you to make each moment of each day.

My advice to you is to CHOOSE to love your husband with the same unconditional love God continually shows you!

For more scripture, refer to Ephesians 5:21-32- really explains the duty of husband and wife.  I also found 1 Peter 3:1-8 to be great advice on marriage!!!!!!

Overcoming Obstacles . . . .

HEALING FROM YOUR PAST

As we read in Genesis 34:7:

“Now Jacob’s sons had come in from the fields as soon as they heard what had happened. They were filled with grief and fury, because Shechem had done a disgraceful thing in Israel by lying with Jacob’s daughter—a thing that should not be done.”

Let’s put this into our lives,.. our terms.. something we can relate too. We all know no one suffers or sins in a vacuum. We can see that in the results of sin all around us every day. But if you be honest with yourselves, we can see it in our own lives too. Maybe you have been abused or taken advantage of. You may feel you have no future or no hope for a positive change in your life. Maybe others you know are suffering because of the actions of one person. God can worth through any situation. He cannot change the past, but he can work through the present to help you cope with your current situation, change your attitude, grow and ultimately thrive. No matter what happened to you, God knows. Turn to him for comfort. Ask him to heal your hurting heart and to restore you. He is the only one who can restore your soul.

Bottom line, you need to HEAL yourself. … Quit mourning… Quit dwelling…. It’s done, it’s over and no matter how bad you want to go back and make it all go away… IT’s IMPOSSIBLE TO CHANGE THE PAST!!! You have the ability to trust in God and allow him to heal you and restore you but when you keep going back and keep dragging yourself down.. You are your own worst ENEMY.

Let Go………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………Let God!

CHOOSING YOUR PATH

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6

TRUST & OBEY! These words go together like "peas and carrots" :) . Yet every day we face difficult situations that seem to defy simple solutions. As women, countless difficult choices face us----(things I can relate too!)---- the right course of care for a sick child, moving from everything familiar for a new opportunity, ugh and I cannot forget following God’s leading even when the outcome is hazy, even when the right choice frightens me to no end! You may toss and turn for nights without finding peace in choice. (Been there…. A LOT)

So, How do you determine the right choice, you ask? OBEY the guidance you find in God’s word, pray and seek trusted advice, then TRUST God with the outcome!

God blesses those who trust in him.

God cares for those who trust in him.

Trusting God brings joy, peace, and hope!

BE READY FOR THE STORM

“The rain came down, the steams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house: yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.” Matthew 7:25

This is a subject I know all too well. When storms come in your life, they may bring sorrow and pain—an illness, an accident, or even a betrayal. In the midst of the event, your decisions can help save you and your family. Let’s face it, disaster can hit whether you are a saint or a sinner. To survive requires spiritual preparation. When you build your home on the foundations of God’s word, you can find safety despite the downpour going on outside. You can help those you love to weather the storm as well. Begin now to prepare your house for the storms to come:

• Spend time in the Bible! ! ! 
• Strengthen your relationship with God and with a godly community!!!! 
• Bring those you love before God in prayer! ! ! 

With that all being said, prepare yourselves so that when (NOT IF) the violent windy storm hits, you will have shelter!

*Although we cannot see the future… if you spiritually prepare yourself for all the possibilities in your current situation, I promise you it will help you through the hardest times. Things are going to happen; this is the circle of life.. You all know my situation and although none of you could understand this because it a situation not many if any of you have been in… I’m prepared for anything when I wake up in the morning.. Emma‘s days are very unexplainable and I have to prepare for any and every possible outcome…. In the end, I trust in God and follow the path he has planned for me and my amazing family.

NO MORE TEARS--- TRUST IN GOD

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”    Revelation 21:4

As mere mortals, it’s simply not possible to look beyond heaven’s veil to see why God allows things to happen the way they do! The only way I can think to say it is because God is God, and we are not. And let’s face it: sometimes the things that happen don’t seem fair. Bu thankfully, God has sent his son, Jesus Christ, to “save completely those who come to God through him, because he always lives to intercede from them” (Hebrews 7:25).

Though there may be times that we suffer temporarily on this earth – and no one is denying the intense grief we experience as human beings – we can rest assured through faith in Christ, of an eternity where “there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain” (Revelation 21:4).

“The Lord will fight for you; you need only be still.”  Exodus 14:14